by Barbara A. Pitter

Created on: November 27, 2007

Boy, do my kids know "the look". I didn't realize that until many years later when my youngest daughter was telling her kids about "the look" and that they better not mess with grandma when she gives them "the look". I guess they didn't believe her.

So, time goes on and when they would argue and fight to the point of getting me angry, I would say "sit down or else" and they would sit for awhile (maybe 2 seconds) and skittle away when my back was turned. I realized what they were doing because I saw a trend occurring, so I knew they thought they were getting away with something.

One day they came home from school arguing and fighting like crazy people. I held myself together and said in one swoop "sit down and don't neither one of you say a word, do you hear me?" And I sat there and looked at them kinda sideways without breaking my stare. I wanted them to look away before I did. And they did!

That was the first time they didn't skittle away because every time they moved, I heard it and gave them "the look". So after that, I never had to worry about them trying to sneak away again.

But sure enough one day, AJ who was older than Kennedy was playing games on his TV. Kennedy started whining about something because it wasn't going her way. She knew I hated whining so she slipped into the room with her brother and I heard her say, "AJ, I can't get this dress on my doll." AJ said, "Go ask grandma to help you." Kennedy said, "No, she's got the look and I'm scared." AJ said, matter of factually, "Well you better leave her alone then."

I laughed so hard, it made my side hurt because these two youngsters never once asked me about "the look". Their mother warned them about it and they took it for granted that "the look" was going to either whip their butt, scare them to death, or otherwise do them some bodily harm. That just goes to show that kids are very smart. You don't have to physically hurt them, just tell them a few words and they'll imagine that all hell is going to break lose if they don't stop.

So, no matter what any psychologist or anybody else tells you, kids know "when to stop" and when they don't stop, it's because they also know "when they can get away with it." That's it in a nutshell. Most kids are not stupid. They are smarter than you think because they have learned where the stopping point is, if you gave them one! If you didn't, then you have to suffer the consequences.

And just one more example proves my point. My daughter called me from Florida where they

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