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My two teenagers remind me of toddlers on a day trip to the park. One runs one way and the other is trying to go the opposite. It took both my husband and I to oversee the trip. My husband would man one child and I would do the other. Sometime we would switch depending on who had the most energy and patience. It worked then and it works now.

Here is how we keep the teenagers in our family involved.

1. Getting them up earlier in the morning. Because of the extra time before school we have the time for a chat. What is going on today? Where will you be after school? We discuss any concerns and worries they might have. Send them off with a hug if they will let you.

2. Supper is at five p.m. sharp. Every one pitches in to set the table, make the salad and bring in the glasses of milk. Talking and laughing are encouraged.

3. Set aside time for those pesky chores no one likes to do and everyone lends a hand. Reward the good things they do.

4. Friday night is pizza night at our house. Everyone is allowed to bring a friend home for supper and a movie. This is the reward for a job well done all week. My husband and I cater to the children and their guests. We make the pizza, and do the cleanup.

5. We go to school functions as a family. We show our support in whatever they might be interested in at the time. Concerts, plays, sports and art shows we are there to show our love and support.

6. We prayed together and we go to church together.

7. Watch movies and play games together. We have a lot of family games but Apples to Apples seems to be the favorite.

8. Let them be their age. Encourage family unity but also independence. If their old enough to drive the car they are old enough to pick up the milk and bread at the store.

9. Talk to them about problems the family might be having. If there is snow in the drive way then everyone shovels. Share the happy times and the bad times. Life is not going to be perfect.

10. Give your teenager some space. Time away from family is just as important as a well spent Sunday afternoon putting up the Christmas decorations.

The time between the birth of your child and sending him off to college is in a blink of an eye. Cherish the gift of family and watch them grow.

Learn more about this author, Sandria Mushero.
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