by T.C Leonard

Created on: November 25, 2007

"Cheating on a Lover...At Cards"

Well I cheated on my girlfriend
I really took her for a ride
But when she heard about it
She never even cried
She didn't wince
She didn't moan
And she didn't even pout
She just opened up my wallet
And took a twenty out

See I'm not a womanizer
I'm faithful through and through
I like to cheat at poker
But in the bedroom I'm true blue
See when I say I cheated

It's not what you'd expect
She caught me with an Ace of spades
On the bottom of the deck

We were playing Texas Hold 'em
With a couple friends
I caught a Jack and Queen of spades
That would pay big dividends
On the flop the King and Ten
Made me commit my sin
I had the Ace stowed away
So I shouted, "I'm ALL IN!"

The others promptly folded
'cept for my pretty Peggy Sue
She pushed in everything she had
I thought, "The joke's on you!"
She had two Aces and two Eights
I had a draw to make my stand
But it's fitting I would get caught
When she had "The Dead Man's Hand"

But my four spades had her worried
Or at least a bit concerned
She breathed a sigh of relief
When a Deuce came on the turn
I chuckled to myself inside
'bout the heart attack I'd give 'er
When I whipped that Ace out
And beat her on the River

I laid the final card down
And reached out for the pot
But a rap across the knuckles
Was the only thing I got
Seems her gift of observation
Put an end to my charades
One of the Aces in her hand
Was ANOTHER Ace of spades

The lesson of this song, old friend
Is not to never cheat
Just be smarter than I am
And you'll never taste defeat
And all you good two shoes types
Will prob'ly stand and cheer
Cause I'm stuck walking the poodle
And doing dishes for a year

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