1 of 9

Write now Article Tools

The idea that the French kiss everyone they meet is a common misconception. While it's easy enough to get this impression when visiting the country, there are rules that govern the etiquette of greeting in France, as elsewhere.

For example, if you go to a local shop in France, you will not see the French customers kissing the person behind the counter when they hand over their purchases to pay. Yet you may see customers being greeted with a kiss by the maitre d'hotel in a restaurant... but don't be inspired to follow their example unless you are a regular customer and therefore considered a 'friend' of the establishment. What's more, people from southern France are less formal, in general, than their northern and Parisian compatriots, so that you may be expecting one behaviour and encounter another! Confused? So was I when I first moved there, but here are some simple tips to help you get it right.

Informal social situations - meeting friends, or being introduced to new people by a friend
If you're a man, the rules are relatively simple: you shake hands with other men, maybe placing your left hand the other man's upper arm while you do so if you're good friends. Heterosexual men are unlikely to kiss another man unless they're very close friends or part of the family, and even then it may be a hug that is offered, rather than a kiss. For gay men, the etiquette is somewhat different: if you meet another gay man in a social situation, kissing is the norm.

Both gay and straight men are likely to kiss a woman in social situations, whether introduced for the first time by a friend, or meeting up with an existing female friend. And, when meeting socially, women always kiss other women.

Formal social occasions
Whether a ball, a formal dinner or even a wedding, a formal social occasion has, as you may expect, a somewhat different set of rules. This is largely because such events are likely to mean there are people you don't know attending, and you may well be required to introduce yourself in the course of the event. On such occasions, greet strangers with a handshake, whether you're male or female. If you have friends there you would normally kiss on greeting, do the same here but, if they introduce you to someone, shake hands: if this new person wishes to be less formal, they will lean into the handshake and kiss you, so all you have to do is follow their lead.

Business situations
These are slightly more complex, as there are varying degrees of formality involved. Indeed,

• 1
• 2
• 3
• next page >>

Add your voice

Know something about The French do not kiss everyone?
We want to hear your view. Write now!