The world of mathematical academia is in a state of disarray since the establishment of a new theorem in basic mathematic fundamentals last week. The discovery was thrust into the spotlight in Manchester England, by a one, Tina Farrell. The breaking story was first reported in the Manchester Evening News. There were several recognizable scholars working on similar mathematical theories, but it was the renowned mathematical anomaly Tina Farrell, known for her mathematical scholarship and cutting edge theorems, that announced the discovery to the Manchester Evening News after an abhorrent run-in with outdated formulations.

The background of the discovery was as simple as a scratch off lottery ticket. While playing the game, "Cool Cash"-a lottery scratch off game produced by the company Camelot, Dr. Farrell discovered the mathematical flaw that has been perpetuated on mankind since the era of Isaac Newton. The "rules" of the game are to scratch off a number that is smaller than the number at the top of the ticket. Since the game was a winter theme, the numbers represented temperature, usually in the negative degrees.

Dr. Farrell's perilous, peregrination down the road to erudition, started with a "Cool Cash" lottery ticket that referenced a temperature of -8 at the top of the ticket. After timorously removing the thin veneer of paper that stood between Tina and untold fortunes, she stared aghast at the life altering numerals of -6 and -7, respectively.

With merriment, the type reserved for the discovery of the advancement of mankind, Dr. Farrell scurried to the attendant on duty to claim her bounty, but it was not to be. After scanning the winning ticket several times, the scanning machine held nothing but contempt for Dr. Farrell and the scholarly attendant, as they could not come to terms with the illiteracy of the machine.

Thusly, as with many a bereft academician, Dr. Farrell fought back with a series of rebukes for the obsolete mathematical fundamentals that she had unceremoniously become a casualty of. She had a series of comments and theroms to opine:

"On one of my cards it said I had to find temperatures lower than -8. The numbers I uncovered were -6 and -7 so I thought I had won, and so did the woman in the shop. But when she scanned the card the machine said I hadn't.

"I phoned Camelot and they fobbed me off with some story that -6 is higher - not lower - than -8 but I'm not having it.

"I think Camelot are giving people

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