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You can hear the slow drawl of your husband typing into cyberspace from the computer room. There is a pause and then more typing. A slight shift in the chair and an occassional sigh from the hall but otherwise stillness through the house. It is late and you are in bed, curled under the covers, heart pounding as you wonder why your husband chooses to be in front of his laptop, rooms away instead of curled up next to you, sleeping soundly.

A few nights ago, while running to the restroom, you noticed your husband was in his computer room, door only cracked. Tonight, it seems is no different and now a thought runs through your mind like a freight train. "How long has this been going on?"

Men and women have been perplexed by the addicting nature of the Internet since it was unveiled to us in all of its mysterious glory.

Temptation now comes in full color and for the most part, nearly perfect anonymity and cheating has had to be reexamined and redefined.
The concept of the ability to cheat online is one with mixed reviews. Does it classify as an act of adultery to look at pornographic materials? What about cybersex? And what about that leap from online friend to "let's have dinner?"

It seems there are many options to go over before you even decide whether or not you want to approach it as an affair or as going a little too far on the computer.
If that was me though, curled up in bed in the middle of the night, listening to my husband type away, I would be sure to find out and in my opinion, all of the questions above are classified as affairs to me.

Finding out if your spouse is leading a second life with someone online is a difficult thing to approach since you could ultimately put your husband's own faith and trust in jeopardy and risk your marriage to find out he is only addicted to fantasy football at three in the morning.
If you are already in a trusting and open relationship, simply ask. Tell him what you saw and heard and don't accuse, just listen. Of course, this is a perfect scenario and you will either be met with a resounding "no" or he may become defensive. If this is the case, drop it immediately but be sure to take note his facial expressions, his responses, and how his behavior with you and with the computer change. Does he look insecure? Is he acting a little too shady? Maybe a little too sweet suddenly?

Do your own investigating. If you and your husband share an account, look it up. Use your own judgement on looking into anything of his such as his cell phone,

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