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Oh! To be young, single and living in Kenya! For some this seems like a death sentence. Why would any self respecting, above average looks, girl want to be alone with the multitude of single guys out there just waiting for the opportunity to jump into their livesand beds? But for the rare ones who see life as more than an endless stream of nameless, faceless individuals, there is lot more to living.
I cannot count the number of times when upon hearing that I do not have a boyfriend, I am asked the question. Come on girls, I'm sure you have been asked this about a thousand times. The how come a girl like you doesn't have a boyfriend?' question. This always leaves me in a bit of a conundrum. First, what is a girl like me? Second, why must it be a case for Mr Holmes and Watson as to why I don't have a boyfriend? Um let me see, I don't have a boyfriend because a) I set ridiculously high standards thereby making it virtually impossible for anyone to come within a mile of me, b) I just feel like it, c) I have an inability to commit stemming from an disastrous incident in my youth that ended in legal battles and emotional scarring, d)I am committed to securing my education and thus have no time for a serious relationship, or my personal favourite e) I'm a closet lesbian who is afraid of coming out'.

Whichever of these excuses one chooses to use (I have always found the last one to work particularly well with annoying guys who just never get the hint); it is never enough, is it?
The common misconception is that a girl, any girl, needs a man to make her feel fulfilled, to validate her existence and sometimes just because it is lonely out there in the big bad world. This unfortunate view makes many girls who choose a different standpoint seem strange and non conformist. There are many occasions where I have been labeled as a man hater, a feminist, sexually deprived and a myriad of other equally flattering names, just because I have voiced my firm opinion that having a man should fall under the want category not the need.
Show me a girl who is happy being single and I will show you a girl who loves her own company. She needs not the validation of having eye candy hanging on her arm because she has come to the realisation that being single is not the end of the world, it could just be the beginning.
When a girl is single, she finds hitherto absent time to discover who she is, what makes her happy and how not to depend upon another person for her happiness. Iyanla

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