by T. S. Love

Created on: November 08, 2007

When things happen, we choose how to react. Usually, this is an unconscious choice we make by default based on how we're wired. That wiring can be changed, however, with the addition of some basic logic:

Some events make me unhappy.
I can't change those events.
I can change the way I perceive those events.
Changing my perception changes my feelings.
I can change the way I feel about events by changing the way I perceive those events.

There are three basic ways of categorizing events:

* temporary vs. permanent
* specific vs. general
* external vs. internal

When "negative" events happen, we choose to view them from one of two sets of filters:

Optimism reacting to setbacks from a presumption of personal power

* Bad events are temporary setbacks
* Isolated to particular circumstances
* Can be overcome by my effort and abilities

Pessimism - reacting to setbacks from a presumption of personal helplessness:

* Bad events will last a long time
* Will undermine everything I do
* Are my fault

Conversely, when "positive" events happen:

The Optimist reacts from a presumption of personal power:

* Good events will last a long time
* Will shore up everything I do
* Are due to my effort and abilities

The Pessimist reacts from a presumption of personal helplessness:

* Good events are temporary happenstance
* Isolated to particular circumstances
* Can be sabotaged by my efforts and actions

These filters can be learned and gradually become habit, with effort. It's sort of a spiral effect; the good keeps getting better and the bad just gets worse. Find the good. React from a position of power. It's worth it.

Reference
Learned Optimism by Martin E.P. Seligman, Ph.D.

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