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Most people will agree that adultery is wrong, but they will disagree as to whether or not an affair is hard to get out of. People who are married and believe there is absolutely no excuse for having an affair believe it is a black and white issue and should be very easy to put an end to. Just stop the affair, act as though the "other person" never existed, return all your focus and attention to your spouse, and act as though she is the only relationship you could ever want. The affair could have never begun if the spouse had been the recipient of your entire focus - the only one you could ever want. She may have been that at one time, but something changed - and if not addressed, the affair will either continue, or another one will take it's place.
Why is an affair so hard to get out of? Because contrary to popular opinion, affairs are not merely physical. Affairs involve the emotions. The spouse having the affair may have deep feelings for the "other person" or they may feel responsible for this person's deep feelings toward them. Either way, the heart is involved and it is difficult to extricate oneself from matters involving the heart. It is sometimes more difficult to end an affair than to divorce a spouse, which is evidenced by the number of people engaged in affairs who leave their spouses and marry the "other person." Obviously there are emotional and sexual needs being met in the affair that were not being fully satisfied elsewhere. When these needs are finally being filled, it is almost impossible for some people to go back to experiencing that void in their life again.
No matter what moral judgments a person makes about adultery, once a person does cross that line and enter into an affair, it is not difficult to understand why it is so hard for them to get out of it.
Learn more about this author, Ceinna Childers.
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