by Effie Moore Salem

Created on: November 05, 2007

Dealing with rude people is best done by not taking the rudeness personally. Do not by any means allow yourself to take the slight, intended or accidental, as a personal affront; but do allow for the possibility that the slight, or rudeness, may not actually be that. It could be only your assessment of the situation.

How other will react to our overtures or our associations with them is never ours to know. And one time affronts and episodes of rudeness do not make a person a rude person; not if they were not intended. Shy people often do not know how to react and may be left looking rude when in fact they are as puzzled by the label of rudeness as anyone else is.

If, however, a person at work or one who is consistently rude to customers or to those around them, then it may be necessary to do something. A co-worker that is a trusted friend may be the one to kindly explain to the rude person they need to improve in the public relations department. A warning, that the job may be taken away if the situation isn't resolved, may be what will convince a rude person to be kind and polite.

Notice, if you will, the check-out people at the super markets. Some are naturally outgoing and telling the customer to have a good day comes easy. You know they mean it. Others, they really couldn't care what kind of day you have, but they tell you anyway. Then there are those shy or backward people who probably care but saying the words does not come easy. But keeping their job is important and they come through and try to be kind and polite.

And the same with those shopping. Some genuinely thank the person that sacks the groceries with a well-mean thank you. Other don't, probably thinking why should they, its part of their job. Being polite takes no more effort than being rude, so why not opt for a cherry smile and a thank you.

How then can we deal with rude people. we can deal with them by not being rude ourselves; we can deal with them by being extra polite and not allowing them to wreck our day; we can deal with them by understanding we must put up with a certain amount of hostility and forgetting about the rude encounter as soon as possible; we can avoid further contact with the rude person.

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