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Let us face the stark, unambiguous fact.Divorce is becoming a way of life.In the United States of America the happily married couple has become the exception and not the rule.More to the point, divorce, broken homes and single parents are no longer the abnormalities they used to be.

If this is true -and it is-then, we should find a way to live with our ex in the event of divorce. Of course, that's easier said than done and the reason is quite simple. You see, in most cases, divorce is not done on amicable terms.Consequently,the bitterness and the acrimony remain long after the former partners have gone their separate ways.

The issue is further complicated in marriages where there are children.Issue like child custody,child support and visitation rights compound an already tense situation.

So, what's the solution?Does your ex automatically become your sworn enemy? Of course not!A number of different steps can be taken to ensure that you break the ice with your ex.And these include the following.

Talk.
Let's face it, you are not a magician and neither is your ex.So, if you don't say what's on your mind, the other party may not ever get to know what's on your mind.Therefore, I suggest you fix an appointment with your ex at a neutral venue and iron things out.Actually,it is always preferable to talk things over than to maintain a pregnant and dangerous silence.

Compromise.
After all this time, it may become clear to you that what led to the divorce in the first place was the blunt refusal of both parties to compromise.So,with the benefit of hindsight,you may have to make some compromises and so will your ex so that get back on civil terms with each other.

Move on.
Recognize the fact that life goes on and move on with your life.Brooding about what went wrong with the marriage will not do anybody any good. So you were married,you had some problems and now you're divorced.So what? Life goes on.Thousands of people are in the same boat anyhow. Simply pick yourself up and get on with life. That is the right attitude.

Keep in touch.
Your ex is not your enemy. This much should be clear to you by now. So, find a way to keep in touch with him or her on a regular basis. A phone call or an e-mail once in a while is cool.
It shows maturity and, more to point,indicates that you don't bear each other any grudges.

Involve your mutual friends.
'No man is an island',and this applies to your ex and you.So, once in a while,find time to get in touch with your former and possibly still present mutual friends.These will serve as a buffer between you two and also help reduce any frictions that may arise between your ex and you.

Finally,show some respect for each other and understand that the past is gone. What matters is the present.This, in my opinion is the best way to break the ice with your ex.
Keep your head up!

Learn more about this author, Emmanuel Osondu.
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