I may have some of the details a little messed up. You'll understand why when I tell you the story.

It was Louisville Kentucky, the early 90's, I was apartment hunting down on 3rd Street. I was desperate, I needed a place quick and downtown was cheap. I put in my deposit and I had a place the same day. The problem was, I had a billion room mates, and none of them were paying rent.

My new apartment was actually once a part of a foyer of a once beautiful mansion. It had been converted by a money hungry slum lord. Of course I didn't know that at the time, but boy, would I get it quick.

The place had a bed, but after I saw my new room mates, there was no way I was sleeping in it EVER. I bought about a dozen roach motels, offering a new place for my roomies to live and then die. I came home to find that they had converted them into studios for mice. So, not only did I have the roomies I was hoping to get rid of, I had roomies I didn't see until the roach motels were filled with mice.

I bought enough Raid to kill a small country; of humans...but roaches would still survive.

I bought boric acid, but that only got them hooked on Jimmy Hendricks music.

I cleaned and sprayed and bombed....and I lost the war, when a river of piss and roaches fell through my roof, my upstairs neighbor's floor. I moved.

The End

Learn more about this author, Rolan Whitt.
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