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Teens can be a handful, actually they ARE a handful, whether you've got the puck rocker or the prom queen sitting in your living room, one way or another, they're some kind of trouble. Dont go thinking that your child is a complete angel because VERY few are. When they do something wrong, the way you punish them is crucial to what they will do next. First things first, yelling is never the answer, if you want to yell put your head in your pillow and scream. You are a parent, you're supposed to be understanidng, there for NO YELLING. Then you get to the point of ' what i should do to him/her' which is the hardest part. Usually grounding you teen will do the trick, only if he or she spends most of their time out with friends. If not then take away something that is important to them, some thing they want, not need. One thing you should never do is punish them with out letting them talk first, you may have heard the wrong version or something different from what happened. So listen to them, ask them what happened. The best approac (I think) is 'i heard (this) happened, we need to talk about it'. This way you are both calm and can actually talk about the situation. Severly punishing a child just to make a point is NEVER correct, punish them because of what they have done, nothing more or nothing less. For example...if you teen is caught doing something like shoplifting, you might want to ground them for about 2 weeks (since it IS illegal and all) but for something minor like, they didnt call, forgot to do the dishes, and take out the trash...just remind them next time. I know what it is like to be told something one moment and forget it the next. When punishing dont do it in a nasty manner, explain to them WHY you are punishig them, and 'because i said so' is NEVER a good reason, your better of saying ' i just want to ruin your life' because that is what they will understand. Make them stand in your shoes as the parents, as them what they think should be theyre punishment (of course they will go easy on them selves but i said ask, doesnt mean you have to do it). AFTER the punishing, if you have done everything right your teen will go to they're room and probably call their friends or play music. If not then they will prbably storm into their room and scream ' i hate you' at the top of their lungs and slam the door. We obviously dont want that to happen, they don t REALLY maen they hate you, thy just think that you are infact trying to ruin their lives. Some things that you might want to avoid saying to your teen when punishing (which by the way you ALL LOVE to say) ' i dont want you to make the same mistakes i did' or 'your too young' or 'its for your own good' then your teen will OFFCIALLY think your trying to ruin their lives, and they wont care what you think anymore and will probably do things that wll get them hurt just to prve that you dont control them. Treat your teen like they are adults... dont tell them theyre babies (it pisses them off TRUST ME) and maybe if you treated them like adults, they would act like it. After all thats what being a teen is all about...growing up.

Learn more about this author, Denise Cruz.
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