At some point a woman will be senseless enough to be able to spend more than 10 minutes alone with you. When that time arrives, there are some things you will have to be prepared for. Things that will hover the lines of human torture or acceptable US government behavior. Cuddle time, shopping at the mall...with your credit card, hanging out with her friends, foregoing yours, and of course the chick flick.

There has not been another issue on the face of the earth that our opposing sexes have found more disagreements on than our cinematic experiences either at home or at the movies. The chick flick obviously at the center of the maelstrom.
Keep in mind gentlemen, a chick flick shall not be seen in any other venue besides yours or your sweetie pie's home. Curtains drawn. We see real movies in the movie theater. That being said, let me introduce you to my list of chick flicks for guys(in no particular order)

Bull Durham: I read that this was a chick flick. It sort of takes something away from it knowing that but not enough to take it off the list. Baseball, swearing, Susan Surandon naked, a little more baseball. Any movie that our female counterparts have kidnapped as their own that happens to have a sport theme to it, is considered safe to watch (Hoop Dreams, the Slugger's Wife, the Natural, Stealing Home, North Dallas Forty...okay not that one, but you get the picture).

White Palace: rich Wall Street boy meets trailer park trash waittress and falls in love. It's timeless. So are the scenes with, you guessed it, Susan Surandon(I don't want to seem like a pig here, but if men are to be subjected to this moving picture genre, the least our ladies could do is have a movie with some T&A in it)

High Fidelity: John Cusack, Jack Black, and Lisa Bonet? Tons of awesome music? A sentimental narrative love story as told by John Cusack who is knee deep in trying to get the love of his life back while sleeping with tons of girls? Pass the popcorn.

the Princess Bride: we will accept a title with Princess in it on rare occasions. Rob Reiner's nifty little fairy tale is the one...and only(that goes for the Princess Diaries and Ice Princess and the Princess and the Cobbler) Swashbuckling, a good story, Cary Elwes before he had to chop off his own foot in Saw, and Andre the Giant as Fezzik? This is one of those you find yourself watching on a Sunday afternoon when no sporting events are on and TNT classics is your only option.

Serendipity: more with John Cusack? I'm beginning to think this guy is lame. This is still a movie that she will enjoy and you won't want to shred your eyes with a cheese grater.

the Holiday: believe it or not this sappy experiment in love got to me a bit. Not to mention I'm a fan of both Kate Winslet and Jack Black's either. Good movie. Not too sappy. Not too long. Ended somewhat realistically too. Imagine that.

Look, we could scratch and claw a few more movies into a list but what good is it? Every Transformers opening weekend you have to attend will be the more time devoted to watching Runaway Bride or some other mind numbing schlock with Julia Roberts in it(unless you can talk your girlfriend or wife into believing that Flatliners is a love story.) This is the price we pay. A small penance to take considering this woman has more than likely seen you naked and has not run from the house screaming bloody murder. So grab your popcorn and something to drink and if you're really lucky she'll fall asleep by the time your self inflicted cornea scratching is finished, just in time to catch the end of anything besides that.

Learn more about this author, Jimmy Ettele.
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