by Kelly Sandefur

Created on: October 18, 2007

As a mother of three, I feel spanking should be used only at a last resort. It shouldn't be outlawed, but it also should not be the first type of punishment dished out, either. This coming from a person who does not spank her children, nor do I have to. At least, not since they were much younger.

Let's look at this from a chronological aspect. An infant of around 8 months old is playing with a electrical outlet and the parent has repeatedly removed the child, only to have him/her scoot back to the outlet and prod at it some more. The parent scolds with a firm "No" time and time again, to no avail. A swat on the rear end might be what it takes for the infant to get the point, and it is not harming them in the least. Your two year old is throwing food at a restaurant, and you've repeatedly scolded them. You pick up your child and swat them on the rear, and the three people at the table next to you look at you as if you just took a hacksaw to the poor child's head. Is the child hurt? No. Surprised maybe, but I bet s/he doesn't throw food anymore. A five year old runs across the street and almost gets bumped by a car they didn't look for. Mom runs out, and after hugging the child and ensuring they're OK, swats them on the rear for not looking. Is the mom wrong to do so? I think not. But as a child gets older and is able to comprehend more, spankings should not be as prevalent. Once a child can reason, they can be reasoned with.

Spanking does no harm, unless you are using something other than the palm of your hand. I am a firm believer that you should never use a belt on a child. I don't see that as punishment, but as intimidation. A spanking just lets a child know that their parent means business and that the behavior they displayed will not be tolerated. However, at some point other punishments can be just as affective. Grounding them from video games or television works just as well, as does grounding them from riding bikes, playing outside, or going to a special event they were looking forward to. It's all about respect, and if your child is taught how to respect themselves and others around them, particularly those with authority over them, spanking should eventually be eliminated out of "correcting" a child at some point in time.

Outlaw spanking? No, I don't think that's the answer. Teaching a child respect? It will go farther than a spanking in the long run. So go ahead and give your child a swat if they need it. Just remember to explain to them why their behavior is intolerable, and they'll learn their lesson that much faster.

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