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I was already married when I had to cancel my wedding.

I what you are thinking, but I promise I'm not crazy! See, my fiance and I were engaged for a month when he received his deployment orders to report to Iraq. We decided to go ahead and get married - in secret. We eloped, mainly for legal reasons. He wanted me to be financially stable while I finished my last semester of college. There was also the benefit of receiving medical care for free. And well, there was the possibility of him not returning home. I know it's not every girl's fantasy to be married in the pastor's office, but I admired the fact that he wanted to take care of me. I felt special and I believe that it allowed us to grow closer knowing it was a secret we had to keep for the next six months.

We decided to go ahead and plan a formal wedding in early January when he returned home. I went through the process of planning, picking and choosing while he was overseas. When he finally returned in late December I was ecstatic. Everything was planned perfectly and we had three weeks to go over the final details. Then my world came to a screeching halt; he received another deployment order two weeks before the wedding. I was crushed.

Not only were the deployment orders bad enough, but he was leaving in a week. I was not currently in my home state, I was visiting him at his duty station. I didn't know where to begin on how to cancel the wedding. Luckily I have wonderful friends that took care of me during this time. I made a few phone calls to the church and to the rental boutiques. Everyone cooperated wonderfully and refunded the money we had spent on deposits.

We were out about $1000 once it was all said and done. If he wasn't serving our country I doubt we would have had such cooperation from these companies. Now, almost a year later I still haven't had my dream wedding and it's not nearly as important to me now as it was then. I'm content with our ceremony in the pastor's office. Oh, and our marriage is not a secret anymore. That unfolded when we canceled the wedding. It was hard to tell everyone, especially my dad, but everyone took it well and was glad that we went through with it regarding the circumstances.

I assume we'll have a ceremony someday, perhaps on our five year anniversary. I'd like to be able to wear my wedding dress at least once in my lifetime.

Learn more about this author, Ashley M Woods.
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