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or, they can say they are non-denominational. Thoughtful people should take the hint and let the matter drop. Unfortunately, some boorish people may persist in their questioning, and in this event children can say they regard the subject of religion as a personal matter and they would rather not discuss the topic at the present time. If in a social situation, they can excuse themselves and look around for another person to talk to. Technically, this is known as the "brush off".

The reality is that the majority of children around your child probably do follow one faith or the other. Unhappily, members of some faiths sincerely believe they have an unrestricted duty to convert everyone they come in contact with, and they are actually coached in the psychological tools to use on outsiders. This is reprehensible, but again a fact of life your child needs to know.

If a child feels they are somehow missing something because they don't belong to a religion, they should be aware that being an atheist means they are keeping company with courageous and educated people who often hold high positions of responsibility. Social research consistently demonstrates that there is an inverse relationship between education and religious belief so that the more education a person has attained, the less they are likely to profess religion.

Your parenting task will be made easier if you strive to maintain open and honest communications with your child so they never hesitate to come to you when they are in doubt about what to do. Encourage an attitude of questioning.

Rudyard Kipling wrote:

I keep six honest serving men
(They taught me all I knew)
Their names are What and Why and When
And How and Where and Who.

If children can appreciate why they should ask questions and be skeptical of facile answers, then there is no problem teaching them about anything, including organized religion. Many families live their lives around their religion so it is reasonable to assume their playmates or friends may belong to a family that is religious. Your child should know that atheists generally defend the concept of freedom of conscious, which simply means that it is OK to hold any belief regardless of what other people may think or say. What matters are the actions one takes because of their beliefs.

What about actually exposing children to different religions? Should you take your child to services at a Catholic, Protestant, Buddhist, Jewish, or other house of worship? The answer to this question depends upon their emotional maturity, which probably correlates to the age of the child and whether they are demonstrating a curiosity about religion. Indeed curiosity about religion may be an outward sign of a mature self reflective nature taking shape. Any such exposure should be preceded and followed by discussion. Be aware that very young children may be overwhelmed by the emotional atmosphere in some churches and this is something to be sensitive about.

Learn more about this author, Richard Collins.
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