by John Oystein

Created on: October 11, 2007

Role-playing games (RPGs) attract people from the different walks of life. It may be a stereotype, but players in RPGs tend to be the four I's: introverted, individualistic, imaginative, and intelligent. While the pretty kids and jocks are hanging out at the malls and attending the wild parties, gamers sit around a table in the backrooms, tossing around the 20-sider.

Gamers themselves can be subdivided into several categories. Among one of the larger groups are the hack 'n' slashers. To them, the game involves only two things: killing people and breaking things. A small fraction of gamers are known as "real role-players." They're the folks who bother to learn and evolve their characters, and actually use the skills their characters come with. Finally, there are the rules lawyers, perhaps the second-most dangerous of all gamers. (The first most dangerous are the folks that go around in the steam tunnels and actually do get involved in Satanism. Fortunately, this is a tiny, tiny number.)

What makes a rules lawyer so dangerous? The same reason shysters are dangerous in the real world. They actively seek to ruin the fun for everyone, exploiting others stupidity or gullibility, simply for their own gain. This is not to say a rules lawyer is a total detriment to the game, just like there are many lawyers who are a benefit to society. A good rules lawyer, at the right times, can add great spice and balance to the game.

So, how do you spot a potential rules lawyer?

To begin, consult the sages of the RPG players. Any game master, or gamer, for that matter, worth their salt needs to read Kenzer and Company's "Knights of the Dinner Table," created by Jolly Blackburn. The earlier editions are the most valuable. A GM needs to own at least the first four "Bundles of Trouble" volumes.

There one will find the adventures of a quintet of gamers, the eponymous "Knights of the Dinner Table." Focus attention on the big guy at the end, the king of rules lawyers, Mr. Brian VanHoose.

Brian makes an excellent study case for rules lawyers; Jolly Blackburn just didn't make up this guy. Observe the following physical characteristics:

1. Size: Rules lawyers seem to gravitate to the "big" end of the scale. Actually, they don't really gravitate; they have their own gravity fields.

2. Posture: Observe Brian's posture: leaning forward, hunkered now, one arm on the table. This is another sign of both defiance and defensiveness.

3. Position: Rules lawyers automatically position themselves directly

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