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Parenting teens with less rules and more apologies

Teenagers are learning to be adults. They need to learn that there are rules, but they also need to learn that they can be trusted- at least until that trust is broken. When a teenager is given more responsibility and treated like a more mature individual that teen is more likely to behave that way. Treat him or her like the child they used to be and they will do whatever it takes to make their mark- and a lot of times that means acting in an adult manner without adult maturity.

Many times adults will fail to recognize that their message has gotten through to their teen. They put down more rules to try to control their behavior and refuse to recognize that they may have been going about it all wrong. They assume that when their teen has come in a few minutes past curfew that he or she was breaking the rules. They chastise their child before they hear the explanation. When they find out the child was working late or perhaps had car trouble they don't acknowledge their own error. And that can teach a child that apologizing isn't necessary, as well as break their own resolve to be a good, mature individual.

Don't be afraid to tell your teenager that you're sorry for misjudging them. Be frank and honest about why you felt that way and sincerely apologize. This will show him or her that they can trust you and that you respect him or her as an individual. Think before you scream and give your child a little more freedom. Then reward your child when he or she proves that you were right to allow them that little bit of extra freedom. Believe in your child and recognize that the child is growing emotionally and mentally and isn't likely to just follow the pack. How can they grow into a responsible, well adjusted adult if you don't allow them?

Learn more about this author, Lizzie Flynn.
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