Positive role models are assets for all, but especially for children. When our children were infants and toddlers, we were the role models and teachers in their lives. As their first power authority and source of security we exerted a great amount of influence in their lives.

Children grow and life changes for them and us. They go to school and meet other authority figures. Peers sometimes exert tremendous pressure on our children to adopt certain types of clothing and even certain types of behaviors to fit in with the crowd.

We've all been there as children but perhaps we've forgotten the influences that were present then. Its our role models as parents that need re-examination.

Today's youths come home to an empty house; they have homework, sports and social activities of their own. The limited time for parents and youth to solidify their relationships is virtually gone by the time the young person reaches puberty, and that is a difficult transition for them.

Children past the adolescence stage are looking to establish their own identities separate and distinct from mom and dad. They've discovered their sexuality and their ability or inability to attract those of the opposite sex. For some youth, it's a period of rebellion.

One of the greatest influences on our children today is the music and it's entertainers. The tabloids exploit the lives of entertainers and today's youth try to emulate them in music style, dress style and life style.

Entertainers, by assuming leadership role in our youth's lives, are giving them permission to act out risky behavior. This behavior can lead to unwanted pregnancies, drug or alcohol addiction and loss of values.

We see our children today embracing celebrity sport figures who are involved with steroids, drugs, guns and some are dealing with manslaughter charges stemming from drunk driving.

We also see performance-based affection in dysfunctional families. The unspoken (or spoken) word there is; if you make good grades and behave yourself we'll love you. If you don't do those things, we'll withhold our affection. Emotional blackmail is a better term for this kind of parenting.

When parents are loving and supportive and closely involved in their children's lives, we see positive results. They interact in healthy ways and allow each other a voice and opinion even if it differs.

I think it comes down to choices. If we do the right thing and take back our parenting leadership roles, we might see some dramatic changes in our youth. If, on the other hand, we abdicate our role as leaders in our homes, we are giving celebrities and peers permission to lead our children.

We can reassess the role of role models in our society, but perhaps it's our own role that needs the most honest re-examination. We can't choose role models for our children after they reach a certain age but if we reconnect to them and provide leadership, we can give them a far better perspective on life than celebrities can.

Learn more about this author, Mona Gallagher.
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