The Impossible Question

Most men (and women) will agree, there are some questions that are impossible to answer correctly or even diplomatically. Well, good news- help is here! I have come up with some solutions to aid the poor helpless males who find themselves in these compromising situations!

Your significant other gets all gussied up, admires herself in the mirror and then comes to you with the dreaded query "Does this outfit make me look fat?"

Alright, right now I am telling you there is no way to answer this question. If you say "no honey, you look good in anything"-you are lying, if you say "NOOO WAY", you're lying, if you say "well..a little"- you will be confronted with tears and possibly sleeping on the couch. Also, you must actually LOOK with a blank face, because any facial expression will be subject to a barrage of accusations (you made a face, you are laughing at me, you didn't even LOOK hard enough). If you tell her you wont answer, then she will think she looks fat. If you change the subject, you are avoiding telling her she looks fat. On and on...

So..what to do? I have come up with a few suggestions that might help you get around this age-old dilemma:

1) Break out the jewelry you keep on hand for such occasions- such as diamond necklaces, earrings, a tennis bracelet or anything from Tiffany's. When she asks the question, simply surprise her and say "baby, you look beautiful and this _____ will compliment that outfit perfectly". She will be so overjoyed that she will forget she asked the question.

2) Surprise her with a shopping spree, or better yet, offer to take her shopping. Ok, if you simply can't stomach that thought , preface it with "baby you look like a million dollars and I want you to go out and spend more for outfits that look as good as that one, and how about other accessories? Then, open your wallet and hand her about $5,000-$10,000-it won't be the same as simply "giving" her money when you are suggesting what she should buy. The amount should be substantial so that it will make her forget about the outfit she is wearing.

3) Now would be a great time to pull out the surprise vacation you bought- "honey, be sure to bring along this outfit on this....3 week cruise!"- be sure to use lots of emphasis and drama- believe me- she will be jumping up and down so much and will be full of affection- she'll forget the question she just asked you.

Ok so some of you might not have

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