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Conspiracy Theory

Most of the time, I turn an almost deaf ear to conspiracy theories. If you look hard enough and long enough, you can come up with a plausible assertion of sedition and treachery for almost any topic of discussion. Now, don't get me wrong; I've read all the books by the experts dealing with conspiracies: "The Illuminatus Trilogy", "The Search For The Holy Grail", "The Knights Templar", "The Lord Of The Rings", "The Far Side Comics" but, they have all served only to escalate my skepticism. I tend to think of myself as, rather more of an observer, than a participant or fanatic in most causes.

There is, however, one particular heresy, one widespread conspiracy, one universally accepted, idiotic fantasy that I must stand up against and shout for all the world to hear. I can no longer sit idly and silently by and allow this untruth, this ANATHEMA! this lie to be further propagated.

We have been deceived! Lied to by every government and every scientist in the world! By teachers and educators and even by our parents! And some of us, I'm sure, have, unknowingly perhaps, passed this lie onto our children and our friends. It must stop!

There! I feel better. But, just which conspiracy am I talking about? Which deflowering of the truth? Which elaborate ruse do I so boisterously condemn? I'm talking about the greatest lie, the most comprehensive conspiracy, ever foisted on the world's population as a whole. I'm talking about the completely ridiculous theory that the Earth is a sphere! Propaganda! Or, as my grandfather used to say, "Horse Manure!"

"But wait!", you say, jumping to your feet to spout an entire litany of "proofs" to the contrary that you, yourself, have been brainwashed into believing.

If an "expert" were to tell you that the sky is green and the grass is purple, does that make it so? Proofs based upon lies and distortions are only proofs to those whose eyes are too blind to see the real truth. And the truth is, we have been duped. All of us. For hundreds of years.

Most of us, it seems, tend to accept a great number of things on the sole basis of what some authority figure tells us. As an example, let's examine the ongoing market relationship and trade negotiations between the United States and China. We, as Americans, have been told that China needs a helping hand, (our helping hand, apparently) to fully embrace human rights and the blessings of capitalism. They are not as enlightened as we are.

This is, obviously, another untruth from the "rounders".

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