"Dear Emmy,

You are my best friend and I know that we will be best friends forever."

Just tonight I was sorting through papers from my childhood and I found this note. It was written ardently by my best friend, and I fervently believed it. I have not spoken to this friend in over ten years. And yes...it still hurts.

All through our lives we form relationships with the desire that they will last forever- and many times they do! But sometimes, for one reason or another, we outgrow these friendships. Sometimes there is an argument that never gets resolved; other times we just slowly drift apart. Life changes such as marriage, children, divorce, and relocation can make it difficult for friends to keep in touch or find common ground.

Losing a friendship can be devastating because it is, in many ways, a death- a death of a relationship! We can work through our grief by remembering the fun times we have shared with our friends, and how much they have enriched our lives.

Sometimes instead of being sad at the loss of a positive friendship, we can work to rebuild that relationship by writing a quick email, making a phone call, or sending a letter. Sometimes we will find that our old buddy is eager to hear from us!

Perhaps there are times when it is good that we outgrow our friendships. For instance, if we have friends who are always getting into trouble and dragging us with them, it may be time to let those friendships go.

Outgrowing a friendship can be hard, but whether we choose to rekindle it or let it go, we can always have the joy of making new friends. As the old saying goes:
"Make new friends, but keep the old; These are silver and the other gold."

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