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especially if it seems he may make more monetary commitments. Most will have more than one man they are "Playing" and if it gets too sexual they will just drop that man and start dating another more seriously. She knows that men like this are a dime a dozen and she can replace one at any time by just sending a few letters to a few men.

So, who is to blame for this type of woman? That is a hard question to answer. Most will say , "Don't hate the player ... hate the game" but many people understand that it is a game and will try to play back. Eventually someone will get hurt because one of them will fall in love. That is what , I think, would hurt the most. I say both parties are equally at fault. If the man is over fifty years old and the girl is under thirty that should be the first red flag. In America it is not our culture to go with ladies that much younger. Yes, it does happen, but not that often.

I feel to stop this behavior the man has to use his head ... the one on his shoulders , and not be ruled by hormones and testosterone. If a young , sexy, girl writes the man he should be very leery of her. It is not to say he is going to get played, but the odds are stacked against him. He must always keep in his mind that he could be being played. He should continue to talk to her but make it perfectly clear that if they do meet the first date will be "Dutch" with each party paying their own way. If he makes this demand up front the player will usually drop him immediately ; after all, she is looking for a score, not to have to play HIS game !

Learn more about this author, Ray Anderson.
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