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Backstabbing has many levels, all the way from playground disloyalty among kids to the corporate level, where virtual backstabbing is almost as much of a fine art as plunging a real knife in the back of an unsuspecting co-worker. The latter kind is where I've had the most memorable experience. Maybe the story of how it happened to me and how I reacted can help someone else.

As manager of a large corporate ad and sales promotion division, I had the responsibility of hiring and developing new employees. One I hired with just a year or two of work experience after college looked like a good prospect. Just in case someone familiar with the story reads this, instead of identifying the gender, but I'll use the male he in all the descriptions.

My instincts were right about the new employee. He was a hard worker, not especially creative, but made up for it in determination and dogged on-time results. From the beginning, he saw me as a mentor, maybe father figure, and one of his most effective traits was to make me, the manager, look good to our superiors. I appreciated all of his work, as well as his value to me, and within two years, he was promoted.

Two years after that, when an assistant manager's job opened up, he was by far the best candidate. Our relationship deepened then because we were colleagues now and shared management duties. I eventually promoted to my company rank level. We also became friends socially, and our families joined together in various events concerned with the company and elsewhere. After about 15 years working together, I remember clearly now ... 20 years later ... the moment I began to find out about his stab in my back.

I was attending a local swim meet watching our kids compete. My assistant manager's wife was sitting in the stands not too far away from me. We had always been very friendly, but on this day when I moved down to sit next to her, she seemed distant and nervous. I asked her if she felt ill, and she denied it. Then, before the swim meet was over, she had gathered her kids and left the area without another word to me.

I didn't think too much about it until the next day at work. Without any previous notice, I was summoned into the office of the vice president in charge of our area of the company. Sitting in a chair next to him was my assistant manager. Like his wife the day before, he looked very uncomfortable when he saw me. Of course, after the meeting started I realized why. The meeting was to let me know he had been promoted

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