by Olivia Bredbenner

Created on: September 25, 2007   Last Updated: November 07, 2007

O.K. so we are all going to vacation together. "I can do this you say to yourself" as a million scenarios tell you it is not going to be easy.You are right and it will take some foresight and planning to make it the vacation you hope it can be.Vacationing with in-laws will be an adventure in human behavior.But you may have been blessed, and it will special to all of you.

*Talk about what each of you would like to do on this vacation.
*Discuss expenses related to trip and adjust things accordingly,be sure it is affordable and without hardship to anyone.
*Be sure that there is enough time for each to take care of responsibilities related to travel. Getting car fixed.New luggage needs.Or appointments needing to be kept,may affect travel plans.

Some great thoughts in planning should include both you and in-laws talking about the vacation and making the plans. There will be some generational differences in tastes and what each thinks is a "vacation." You and your husband may want to dance all night and the in-laws are thinking laying on hammocks or reading a book sounds like fun.Or in spite of your thoughts about this,it could be the other way around and your in-laws stay out all night.
There should be a reasonable expectation that time together will be important to all of you,and there hopefully is not a member along on this vacation,who has just acquiesced for the sake of another.

Even if you are part of a family there are the many different rhythms that each of you have, the things you share are important but so are your differences.
It may be best if you vacation location,includes separate rooms, so each couple has their private space. Then giving a time to meet again for dinner or travel can be set.
There is always a need for your own space,to refresh, take a break then return together again.

It will be a challenge to select different restaurants,hotels,or resorts or taking turns in accommodating each others likes would be ideal.In most cases,planning the vacation will be part of the adventure itself, especially if your tastes and temperaments are compatible.

If the truth be told,life has a way of not promising closeness with out friction and it may be wise to have a day or two where you choose to do different things.Having dinner together after a day like that and sharing your adventures might be appreciated.

Couple time is most important and if you have children with you,in-laws may like taking the children and giving time for you to take a side trip together.It will be good for the grandparents to have the time with the children as you have a couple break.

Regardless of planning you know that there will be unexpected periods of tensions. They will pass if allowed with the forgiving awareness of each other. By far you will have gained some meaningful connections in your relationships.The opportunities to bond as a family are few and far between in this all too hectic life we live. You may be pleasantly surprised to find that there may be be more about each other that you love.

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