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My life, oh how it changed when this disease killed my husband. At age 31 , he died and left me with 2 young children , left to be without their father!
My one hurricane of a year back in 1990 when i fought desperately to find the answers and did whatever i had to do to save my husband. At the time i didn't really think he'd die, he was diagnosed 14 months earlier with it. All the chemo, the surgery that ended up closing him back up cause the tumor was too massive. I watched him cry, i watched him throw up, i watched him get better and then he'd get more chemo and do it all over again.

I took him to a different province for a bone marrow transplant, i thought that this would be his miracle cure. 6 weeks aways from my 6yr old daughter and 1yr old son, during xmas time, oh how i missed them both, but we had to try to save his life, it was his last shot. All the chemo treatments didn't help, the surgery sure as hell didn't, but this they said was his last shot.
We returned home from the 6 week treatment and he caught a pneumonia, we brought him to the emergency ward and he walked in there on his own 2 feet. The hospital made him sign papers that they would not resucitate him if he stopped breathing. I couldn't believe that they had said that to his face, he signed them while i stood behind him and cried. I gave him a back massage in the hospital room and cried and tried not to show him how scared i was for him, cause i didn't want him to be scared too, my teardrops fell on his back and he knew, he told me he loved me, and that was the last time he did so.
The next morning his breathing had gotten worse and the morphine was increased, the hospital room filled with all of our relatives, my children were there, my son running back and forth with the little dress shoes that my mother made him wear. I asked him not to run around and my husband's last words were "let him, it's okay, i like to hear him". His brothers and i and his parents stayed with him up all that night and then the next morning he started to die..
The nurse asked my to say goodbye to him, i asked what are u talking about he's not dying, she said his blood pressure was dropping and it would happen soon. So i held his head on my lap and wrapped my arms around him and told him that i loved him and i always would and that it's time to say goodbye, he couldn't open his eyes but he did hear me, his tears rolled down his face, and that's when i knew he heard me.

This life threatening disease changed the lives of all of our families, it's something i will never ever forget, and the pain will always be with me. I pray that some day there will be a cure for this disease, until then death will be our neigbours!

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