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During peace time, it is easy to respect and support our young adult's decision to join the military. During time of war, it is the most difficult thing to do. Nevertheless, it would be his/her choice to make. In spite of fearful reservations, I would be proud of his/her committment to serving our country and defending our freedoms.

The military is an ideal training ground for learning how to navigate the challenges of life. Many young men and women have gone into the military and received specialized training, which served them well in their later choice of career in civilian life. This is a wonderful option for those who do not have the resources for furthering their education through attending college.

During time of war, it is an option with considerably higher risks. I would not discourage a young adult from serving his country in such an honorable way, but I would ask him to weigh the dangers and negatives of such a decision in a serious light. I would feel compelled to point out the possibility of loss of limb, or even loss of life. If he was adamant about his desire to serve his country, I would have no recourse but to bid him farewell, wish him safekeeping, and hold him tightly in my heart and prayers.

We spend all a child's formative years teaching him to do the right thing. We do not always specify each and every detail of what constitutes the "right thing." We rely on his conscience to be his guide. If we do a good job with his upbringing, he will grow into a responsible, conscientious adult with respect for himself and others. If he makes the decision to take those carefully instilled attributes to a higher level by nobly defending his country and our freedom, we cannot renege on our teachings and complain about our own job well done.

We must respect our young adults' choices and be supportive in appropriate ways:

* We can be activists at home on behalf of our loved one and all the brave young soldiers fighting our war. We can prevail upon our political leaders to make wise decisions and insure our men and women at war have equipment, supplies, technology and leadership to mitigate their exposure to danger.

* We can motivate and mobilize the businesses in our communities to contribute money and necessary items for the comfort of those in training and combat.

* We can prevail upon all facets of the news media to present facts in a truthful and compassionate manner, keeping the moral support of our troops as the utmost priority.

* We can support the families in our communities who are making extraordinary sacrifices every day on behalf of their military loved ones.

* We can implore business,political and medical communities in our country to be generous and supportive in welcoming returning veterans back into our society and giving them every advantage to succeed as they try to assimilate back into civilian life. They should have superior medical care, educational and job opportunities available to them. The government should sponsor special insurance and mortgage opportunities to insure entire families do not suffer for the time their loved one spent in service to our country.

I would not have to choose to send a family member off to war, because the choice would not be mine to make. Neither would I stand in the way of a young adult who felt his calling was to serve in the military and defend his country.

I would, however, make sure as he marched off to battle, I was doing my own battle of sacrifice on the home front. Until he was able to lay down his weapon, I would wield my own weapon of conscience on his behalf.

Learn more about this author, Carol Gioia.
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