by Diane Stacey

Created on: September 15, 2007

A best friend is the person you share a significant portion of your self with and receive the same in exchange. They usually know your thoughts, feelings, desires and deepest secrets. They have been beside you during times of turbulence and also celebrated your every success.

Your best friend has the power to hurt you more than any other person, possibly because they have been exposed to what you think and feel. They understand what motivates you, as well as what breaks you down. After lowering your defenses in a relationship based on total trust, they can be a dangerous ally. They've had a glimpse into your heart and mind and know ways to use it against you.

One of the closest friends I have ever had was one I met at work. We spent months working side by side, doing the same job. It seems we tend to bond over things we have in common in another and gradually form a family from the circle around our world.

Shortly after my coworker celebrated her 21st birthday, she invited me out for a night on the town. We had a great time hanging out together at work and discovered many common interests outside the office. Eventually, our crowds merged and we became real friends. We sometimes seemed inseparable and were sisters in spirit. Your best friend can some times feel like your twin, shadowing who you are.

After a couple of bad experiences with personal safety, we decided to become roommates. We rented a large three bedroom townhouse. While I had a few hard lessons from close friends in the past, I wasn't worried when came to this one. I'd had friends who stole my boyfriends and others who saw me as a way to popularity with a better crowd. My prior friends didn't always share the same morale code that I had based my life on. They made decisions solely based on what was best for them.

It doesn't feel good to be excluded as a factor of importance, knowing that your friendship didn't mean what you thought it should. Learning that someone used you for any reason leaves you feeling bad about yourself.

It was great living with my best friend for the first year. We hosted parties, created holiday routines and shared precious time creating memories. Just prior to our move, she began dating a new guy. It didn't take long for him to resent the bond that best friends have. He was very jealous and controlling. While I have always tried to let people make their own decisions, keeping my personal opinions out of the way, I just couldn't silently watch as his presence created a bad effect

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