My daughter is now twelve and has decided golfing is not for her. Some of her concerns involve the fact that sweat is "icky" and breaking a nail could damage her social status. I'm not sure if her, once a upon a time golf outings with me, turned her against the sport but I'm reasonably sure the lack of pre-teen girls on the course had a major impact on her decision.

I loved taking her with me and I tried desperately to teach her only when she asked for help and avoided negative remarks like she avoids cleaning her room. She loved to drive the cart and the soreness from my neck usually only lasted a couple of days so I let her. On some holes it was simply too hot to hit a drive but she always putted, that was okay with me. Of course this would also reduce the number of strokes it took her to play the hole and ultimately led to her victory dance on the 18th green, that's okay. What she will someday understand is that, I'm her biggest fan anyway.

I've raised two sons and I discovered years ago that forcing them to catch grounders, shoot hoops or hit golf balls does absolutely no good. All you can really do is expose them to a sport and encourage them to try. If they really like it and want to be good, they will. If not, you will quickly turn them against it and they will rebel. Kids that really love to golf will pick up most of what they know from watching you and other people golf anyway and if they want lessons, they'll ask for them.

Don't force them to swing a certain way even if they aren't getting results. If they ask you what they did wrong, tell them what you think and encourage them to try something else. Don't ridicule a bad shot, this doesn't fix or help anything. Praise them whenever you get the chance, even if it's for knowing the par of a hole or calculating the yardage correctly. Above all, let them golf when they want to, especially when they are young. Forcing them to golf 18 holes is counterproductive to what you want to accomplish. I had rather them be happy and enjoy the golfing experience while they're young. If they enjoy golfing, they will be much more likely to keep golfing and this is what makes them better and what makes them love to golf.

I once told my son as he was heading out the door for a baseball practice that the clothes he was wearing looked pretty bad. He stated that it was only a practice to which I replied that "if you look sloppy, you play sloppy". A few weeks later I was on the golf course with my daughter and she had pulled her visor over her head and it was hanging around her neck. I wanted to say something about it but didn't. She lined up for the shot and was about to start her swing when she stopped. She pulled her visor back onto her head, looked me straight in the eye and said, "If you look sloppy, you play sloppy". I didn't even know she heard what I had told her brother and realized that kids hear and remember more than you might think they do so, be careful what you say and stay positive.

Learn more about this author, Randall Joines.
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