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The one with the most rules LOSES.

Yes long distant relationships can and do work. All relationships work, until they do not. What I mean is that all relationships, even long distance ones, work for a whilethen something changes. What changes it? Rules! In the beginning there are usually very few rules. We are just so happy that someone we are attracted to, is attracted to us. We are thrilled that we are not alone anymore. In fact we are so thrilled that we set aside most of our rulesfor the time being, until we can firmly establish our connection, at which time we can safely start applying our rules without risk of war, or worse, their leaving us.

"She never cleans the house", "he's never home", "she's always in my hair", "he never picks up his clothes", "she hates all my friends", and the list goes on and on. None of which were ever a problem in the beginning.

All relationships work until the rules start getting put in place. Long distant relationships, like any other, work, until one or more of the parties involved puts in place a rule that says it can not.

The rules we have for relationships, and every other area of our life for that matter, determines our level of happiness, PERIOD! It is quite simple to determine a person's level of happiness by finding out all of their rules. Example: you must call if you're going to be late. Slow cars should stay out of the fast lane, ect. ect,.

Please don't misunderstand me; I'm not saying that rules are not sometimes justified. All I'm saying is the more of them you have, the more opportunities there are for them to be broken, and thus, the more opportunities for you to be angry, disappointed, frustrated, or whatever. Bye-the-way, we all justify everything we think, including our rulesthat doesn't make us right or wrong, just justified, at least in our own minds.

Almost all of us try to guarantee the success of a relationship by finding someone whose rules closely match our own. But what if we had no rules? What possibilities could there be if two such people were involved? What level of happiness could two people bring to a relationship if they had no rules?

This brings up a second key ingredient for success of a relationship, long distance included. Most people are looking for what they can GET OUT of a relationship, rather than what they can put IN TO it. Most people see commitment as obligation, rather than what it should bean opportunity!

Every act is an act of self definition. If we remove the all of our rules, and

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