by Jennifer W.

Created on: August 29, 2007   Last Updated: May 02, 2009

With the various social groups facing students in today's schools, learning how to fit in is of tantamount importance to every child. Sometimes this tasks seems insurmountable, while for others it seems to be as natural as breathing. There are some tips, though, that will help that child who is struggling to fit in, whether by going out of the way to be especially nice, or by simply being ones self.

I found while in high school myself, that going out of my way to do something unnecessary for someone usually resulted in gratitude and a new friend or closer friend. I remember one time when there was a group of girls skiing, it was getting late and one other girl and I were the last going down the slope, all of the rest of our group was waiting for us to leave. The poor girl I was skiing with couldn't stay on her feet and fell at least 20 times on the way down that last hill. She kept telling me to leave her and she'd catch up, but instead I slid to a stop each time she fell, made sure she was ok, and continued on with her. That event struck a chord in her to the point where she accepted me into her circle of friends. This concept can work in a number of different ways. For example, offering to help a classmate study for a big test, or partnering to do a big project. No matter how you slice it, if you go out of your way to be nice to someone else, you will generally win their friendship.

Most importantly, children need to be themselves when trying to fit in with classmates. Yes, following trends is cool, and doing what the "in" crowd is doing will make them more popular. Unfortunately that in crowd may or may not be the best group of friends though. If your daughters are being pressured into wearing clothing that is unflattering simply because the popular girls are wearing it, take her shopping and show her how to dress beautifully and classy without looking like an easy catch. Acting like ones self will prevent children from falling in with a bad crowd and will often catch the eye of other kids who want to be popular and have friends without being a part of that crowd too.

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