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If your thinking of marriage you need to approach your prospective bride openly and honestly before getting down on one knee. Often when we're in love we overlook potential problems or niggles, we delude ourselves into thinking that everything is okay, when in fact, there may be aspects of the relationship which are not quite right. Rest assured, I am not suggesting that you seek perfection as you will rarely find it, however, what I am advocating is that you are open and discuss honestly with your partner any 'niggles' or 'cracks' in the relationship that may be evident prior to marriage. Having discussed these, both your minds should be at rest that what has been discussed will not get in the way of you spending your lives together - ensure that there is nothing lurking that is likely to worsen or cause problems to you as man and wife - honesty at this stage can prevent heartache in your future.

Having undertaken the above, I believe that the most important question that a man can ask his potential bride is "do you love me as I am?". There is no doubt that women, whether they admit it or not, often go into a relationship (and even marriage) with the belief that their man may not be perfect, but that they can change him - this is rarely the case and this belief is the cause of considerable domestic upset over time in a marriage. By asking this question and encouraging your potential bride to be open and honest in her response, you will be able to uncover the depth to which she believes change is necessary. Superficial change, such as picking up your dirty socks from the bedroom floor, or to stop cutting your toe-nails in the lounge is irrelevant as these sorts of things can be changed easily and have usually arisen as the result of a mother who has been too indulgent (sorry Mums). However, if your bride to be begins to tell you that she should like you to be more attentive and that your personality could do with toning down, then these are things which rarely will change permanently over time. So, in response to what she reveals during this questioning, you have to consider if you can be everything she wants (intends) for you to be - and if you can't will it lead to difficiulties in the relationship. This question is often overlooked in favour of the "do you want children" type of question (also important) but it is fundamental as you probably won't get to procreate if you don't get this one right!

As a result of discussing the above, it may be revealed that your intended bride has delusions of grandeur. You may be happy working in the body shop of your local garage, she however, may have a more illustrious future planned for you. Questions along this line will reveal whether or not your relationship can stand the test of time.

Formulate your questions careful or you may regret it!

Learn more about this author, Laura Lytton.
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