Vietnam changed many lives: The inhabitants of Vietnam, the soldiers who fought the war as my husband did, and their families. As a combat medic experiencing the Tet offensive, a nineteen year old came into contact with unbelievable atrocities that even the most seasoned soldier could find hard to deal with. The teenager had left his neighborhood of buddies and their parents who had grown up together. They shared the same block, the same youthful craziness, and the same love of family. This, the war, most of the neighborhood could not share.

This ultimately changed the teenager's perspective on life; having lost his best friend to the Vietnam Conflict, future relationships and the outlook on the future were no longer unaffected. Every day became a fight for survival. Every day no longer made sense. Returning home was no help. The people around him could not possibly understand, making a homecoming to normalcy impossible. Adding to attempting to go back to a normal life was the realization that a large majority of people thought you had done a terrible thing, instead of a heroic one. There were no accolades, only scorn for what the young soldier had done.

I met my husband many years later. He could be very considerate, but at other times present a cold uncaring veneer. Alcohol was his primary lover: I became his second. He came into my life when I too, was struggling where I was in the scheme of life.

As a child, I lived in a dysfunctional family: My mother was mentally ill. As a teenager, drugs became prevalent and I felt the need to help my peers. I was already working a part time job when I left school; by the time I turned nineteen, I was working at a successful full-time job. My career was flourishing, allowing me to travel and lead a good life. My first marriage ended; I always believed marriage was for life. I was disillusioned with marriage when I met my current husband, the Vietnam vet.

My parents never had the opportunity to attend college. My dream was to finish high school and attend college. As the years went by, the idea became harder to grasp. To make the plunge into the academic world at an advanced age was hard to explain to my friends, and even difficult for me to have the strength needed to begin the journey. I was now living with health issues and an alcoholic husband. Each day's events would be a surprise. Would I be able to go to work? Would our apartment be on fire? These would be questions I never knew the answers to. As some of the questions became a reality, education was not a consideration.

As more time passed, sobriety entered our lives and we relocated. Volunteering became a stronghold, one that was fulfilling and also aided in the continuation of my observance of the lives of children in need. The thoughts of obtaining my goal of attending college became a central consideration and passion.

I became a substitute teacher, a change of profession, and received my high school diploma. I am now a senior in college and will have my bachelor's degree in psychology in May: A dream that seemed inconceivable. We have come a long way.

Learn more about this author, Lorinda Eldredge.
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