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and deceit are almost guaranteed signs that a marriage is over. Once the bond of trust has been broken, it affects all aspects of a marriage. You do not believe a single word that comes from your spouse's mouth making even the smallest occurrences turn into an all out war. (Where were you? Where did the money go? Who was he or she talking to?) The feelings you had once had for your soul mate are gone having been replaced with anger and hurt making rational conversation impossible. Some couples will manage to get over the effects of cheating, but they spend the rest of their lives with the seed of doubt whispering in the back of their minds. Holding on to betrayal and the negative feelings it brings into a relationship can be just as devastating as the initial act. If you cannot be happy in the relationship, it is time to escape.

No matter what circumstances have brought the two of you to this point, you need to ask yourself some tough questions. Is there any chance of fixing the problem? Are you willing to continue living like this if the problems persist? Are you or your children being negatively affected? Is there another method of help available? Do you still love your partner enough to do whatever it takes to deal with the issues? Take time away to do some soul searching to make sure of your answers. The truth hurts, but it is easier to deal with when it has not been hidden or ignored. Divorce is the LAST option to be considered, but sometime there just is no other way.

If you decide to leave, you need to prepare yourself and your children. It will be the hardest thing you ever have to do. Plan ahead as much as possible and talk to your children before it happens. There will be a lot of tears and hard feelings, but have patience and give yourselves time to deal with the changes. Finally yet importantly, do not be afraid to ask for help and support. Whether it is a hug or a sincere talk, you need to know that your life is not over. There is someone out there who does love and care for you. With hard work and time, your world will slowly change and you will see light at the end of the tunnel.

Learn more about this author, Angie Haggstrom.
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