If there was a magic formula that would let me create the perfect apology ever single time that I needs one, I'd give blood to get it. Unfortunately, apologies are those kinds of things that either flow freely, rooted in sincerity, or else they must be extracted, painfully at times, like a rotten tree stump or a stubborn tooth. You never quite know how the other person will react to the apology. This adds a bit of risk and uncertain to life because you can't go through life without offending someone at some time. There's no shortage of opportunity to ask for forgiveness from the transgressed.

If you want to apologize, and you're conscientious, you'll want to make a good effort and to be as sincere as possible. Is there a perfect apology, the gold standard of repentance, if you will? Or is this perfect apology a myth instead of a reality?

I think it's a myth. No set string of words of apology will fit in all occasions because people don't always react the same ways to apologies. Your apology has to take into account the thoughts, feelings, and sensibilities of the "victim", but there is no obsolute way to find the "perfect apology".

So if you get in a bind and have to ask for forgiveness, just remember that there is no "Get Out Of Jail Free" card when it comes to apologizing. Be thoughtful about your transgression and the person you've hurt. Think carefully and choose your words and delivery to match the victim. You'll be glad you did.

Learn more about this author, Mark Dykeman.
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