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What do you really want?
He asks eyes boring into me
The question
Unexpected interruption
To casualness of football watching
Just discussed
Sweatiness of long hair under football helmets
How the red wine is too dry

Sitting cautious distances apart
Across his spotless living room
He ensconced up straight in oxblood leather throne
Me sprawled on disheveled across couch pillows

Set my wineglass down
Carefully on a polished crystal coaster
He hates messes of all kinds
But Oh
Now
I'm going to give him one
Just for asking me
That question

All the things
I'd never said
But should have
Will stain the upholstery
Gush all over this
Fluffy pristine eggshell carpet
With not one single stiff fiber out of place

Someone who acts
Like he gives a damn I'm on the planet
Someone who'd change my tire at 2 am in the rain
If I call stranded
Someone who thinks I'm pretty
Without makeup and black lace on

I can't breathe
Sip of wine
But
It doesn't help
Too bitter
Like me

Someone who remembers my birthday
Someone who isn't
Self centered
Isolated
Pompous
Like you
Someone who doesn't mind it when I cry
I don't do it very often
But I think I will now
Just because it bothers you
I start to tear up
As if on cue

I know
He says

Well then
You just know everything
And didn't need to ask me that
You just wanted to see if I'd flinch
I hate so much
When you do that

And I hate all your sloppy tears
So emotional over nothing sometimes
It didn't hurt
me asking

I set the glass down again
Right on the table
Because he doesn't
Want me to
And
Not crying anymore
Because
Wants me to

Nothing is
Exactly right
You sadistic prick
I say quietly over my shoulder
Walking out the door

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