Time eludes me in a mask of happiness
Although happiness does not equate to self worth
I see the sun rise in the morning
And wonder if my time is used wisely
Determination is no longer key
When indecisiveness takes over
Strong wills are present
Silent voices unheard
I don't care too much at all
But have an addiction to control
Control meaning having my way
Control meaning making secret wishes come true
If I don't have a partner in life
Then what am I made of
All I want is to be alone
To hear silence
To feel isolation at it's best
Wander for intellectual miles
Never hearing the sound of one's voice
Pressures don't shake me
Thoughts and ideas do
They crash over me in waves
Pulling me under into a world of thoughts
But so much of reality
Relies on what can happen here
I can't say if I'll win the battle
But I know for a fact
I will not lose
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