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Testimonies: Dates from hell

I should have known the date was not going to go well when the guy called and woke me at 11Pm the night before because he wouldn't be able to sleep if he didn't know the specific time I was going to show up for our trail ride date. Mind you, I had previously given him a reasonable "within a half hour" arrival time, considering I was driving an hour from Valley Center to Alpine to meet him.

I had met him on horse lover's dating website. A trail ride sounded innocent enough, but my horse was too young to bring on the trail ride. I also didn't have a trailer in which to transport him. My date said he would provide one of his horses for me. I had warned him I was only good for about an hour of trail riding, since at the time, I was not in shape for much more. He replied "What does it matter? The horse is the one doing all the work?" (That is a load of bull, since you use your core muscles, your seat and legs to stay on.) That was Clue two I was in for a long day.

I arrived at 7:00am so we could get started before it got too hot. I should not have worried about it, since the guy took his time getting his horses and tack loaded, finally proceeding to stop at a local store to pick up picnic items. It was a wonder we even made it to the trails before dark. I did have to wonder why we would we need more than water if we were not going to be out that long. I found out, much to my dismay, that the planned trail ride itself was well over 4 hours, and over fairly rough terrain. (On the plus side, the scenery was gorgeous, and I had a rock solid horse to ride.)

The stunts my date pulled were amazing, and not in a good way. At first he had told me, "This is a trail ride, honey, not a date!"...then a ways up the trail, he wanted to "Coax a kiss out of me". Had I had the confidence then that I do now, I would have told him "It's a trail ride, honey, not a date!".

Another stunt he pulled was telling me he had to make a "nature call". I figured, fine, he'll find a tree and go behind it and do his business. Was I ever wrong! He whipped it out and starts peeing on his horse's leg! He tried to get me to look, but I refused. He even had the audacity to tell me it was "better than lineament" for the horse! Needless to say I found that most disgusting.

As sore as I was, I finally got it through his thick skull that I was hurting and that we needed to head back. When arrived back at the staging area, and had a light supper of crackers, sausage and cheese. After supper, he had the audacity


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