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Created on: August 22, 2007
Getting ejected from a pool hall is actually very simple. Just follow the follow 6 steps and you'll find yourself on the street before you know what happened.
1) Abuse, destroy, and deface all of the equipment. Why do you need chairs when you have a big comfy table to sit on. Furthermore, those pockets are ideal as an ash tray and beer holder. Break cue sticks, throw balls around, and dent the fabric. This combination can help you find yourself out of the door faster than you can say 'presto.'
2) List all of the vulgar words that grace the dictionary out loud. This will indicate to everyone around you that you feel that you are person to be reckoned with. Pool as everyone knows is a game for low lifes and bums during the great depression and you thought should keep the ritual going.
3) Attempting to murder the ball, innocent standbyers, and your opponent with your next shot. This immediately signals that you are looking for anger management and not pool. After realizing that the table has not experienced your graceful stroke, you decide to miss the cue and rip the table cloth. If rip jeans are in fashion, then it would only be fitting for the table to also be chique. But why stop there when you can break the cue stick.
4) I make my own rules
They don't really mean it when they say no gambling. Sure you can just joke around an play for a can of Coke, but I am talking about the real deal gambling that only the 'courageous' dare to do. Not only is illegal but in the shadows a hustler is waiting to 'confesicate' your cash. Other typical mistakes include underage drinking.
5) Unwanted Solicitation
Targeting the right audience is an important element of advertising, so where else can a person sell their equipment than at the local pool hall. Why would you ever need to ask the owner for permission, you are too good for that.
All of these methods have proven effect in helping people get ejected from their local pool hall. Players should change their habits if they find that they have any of these characteristics.
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