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Of course it depends on how hard up for money your family is, but I'd start with: find your nearest food bank, health clinic, second-hand clothing store, and community center. But, even before that, try to get help from the absent parent. All states have some method for getting money out of absent parents. Unless the absent parent is deceased or otherwise out of the picture, they are the first place to seek help, with or without their consent!

Ask for help from government agencies too, there's no shame in asking for what your children need. Granted, welfare only lasts for a maximum of 5 years and it is quite demoralizing to be involved in the "system", but you do what you gotta do, ya know? Kids always need something, and parents always feel guilty when they can't buy it for them, but there's no need to feel so guilty. Welfare can help, however, you still need to know the tricks of being poor.

First is spend time with your children; they will remember the small things you do for them much longer than that skateboard you can't afford to buy them anyway. Take the time to go to a school play or show up for conferences. Find free activities to do in your neighborhood, like the park, or community center. Pick flowers, find discount movie houses and make a day out of seeing old movies or playing.

Take your child to the park to feed the ducks and spend some time reading together. Free entertainment is all around if you look. Check out libraries, parks, YMCA programs, and city sponsored recreational programs. Of course if you have parents, moving back home for a while is nothing to be ashamed of either, I would have if had any parents. The thing to keep in mind is how much better off you are without that dolt of an ex-husband dragging you down. That's what kept me going!

I was in dire straits many times,but had an aversion to welfare. I just worked more hours, did overtime, piecework, got a second job, anything to make sure I didn't owe anyone anything. That's just me, if you feel ok with government money, go for it, looking back on it now I wish I had too! I was silly, and too proud to ask for help. The bottom line is, just do it. If you have to lower your own expectations for a while till you get caught up, do so. Millions of single mothers go through many years of poverty till the kids are grown. How do you deal? You just do! Sorry to spew out reality like that, but it's true. Life will most likely be very bleak for many years, but there are rewards too. -A bank account can't say I love you.

Most important, tell your kids how special they are and how smart they are every day so they learn that clothes and "things" and possessions aren't all there is to life. If you look there are lots of resources to help you, lots people who care and someday when the kids are old enough to support themselves you'll be very proud of yourself! then you can concentrate on pampering yourself because you deserve it!

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