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I have a favorite story for dealing with nosy "friends," many of whom were not really friends in the first place, I suppose.

When I was madly in love for the first time, it seems everyone in my tiny town had a story about me (if they did not have one, they invented one). Most people my age were already married or involved, and I suppose I was of immense interest as a single woman. For example, I began to hear that I had somehow developed an exciting relationship with a prison inmate who had apparently come from my hometown (a man I had never seen or met, actually), and I guess I had also birthed an illegitimate child (news to me!)by this inmate. I do not know to this day where I supposedly have hidden this child, but that is irrelevant to a truly nosy person, isn't it? Some of the stories I began to hear truly rivaled The Omen, Something to Talk About, Pretty Woman, and more!

I finally tired of hearing this gossip about myself (and I do not believe true friends relay such negative gossip either, for the record), so I finally bought an ad in the local newspaper. I worded it thusly:

"For those of you interested in my love and sex life (or lack thereof), you are welcome to call me and ask me about it, and I can confirm or deny any of the rumors you are either hearing or spreading. You can either call, or please refrain from spreading these stories. Thank you."

Bear in mind this was a SMALL town, and many of the women I saw the next day were completely red-faced and would not look me in the eye. However, their boyfriends and husband would burst into belly laughter upon seeing their wives' shamefaced responses, and that made the purchase very worthwhile, indeed. This also prevented any gossip from returning to me for at LEAST three or four years...seriously!

In a more intimate environment where people are actually prying, there are a few ways to deal, and one will be an actual confrontation or challenge, such as the standby: "Why? Are you writing a book?" or, "Are you writing my biography, because I could use a cut of the profits, too...", etc. Humor is a great way to deflect the comment back to the appropriate person, I have found. Most times, though, a direct challenge will need to be stated in order to assure that the person understands nosiness is neither humorous OR welcome.

If this is a true friend, it might be the rare friend who feels they are being caring by asking intimate questions, and if they have been your friend for awhile, certainly you will likely be

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