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Roses, moonlit walks and candlelit dinners - how romantic! Don't we all wish that romance was easy and happened with no effort? It's hard work to maintain a relationship and spend time with the one you love. But the rewards are truly wonderful. It's romance that keeps us "in love" even after years together have passed, and it's thoughtful consideration that keeps romance alive.

Months pass and we become comfortable together. The everyday things begin. But we must never forget that our love for them is much more than ordinary! Romance is working at ways to put your partner first. It's consideration and kindness and choosing to make them your first priority.

It's doing something new for her. It's buying him something small for no reason except you thought of him. It's baking her favourite cake, it's planting the flowers he wanted, it's taking the dog for a walk even if it's not your job. It's taking the time to think, "What can I do today, that shows I stopped and thought about what they mean to me?"

We all fall into routines as our relationships develop. We take things for granted when they become everyday. You've said you love him every night for years - it doesn't mean any less than the first time you said it, but it's harder for him to appreciate if you say it automatically. So say it in a different way. Tell him he means the world to you. Tell her that she is everything you've ever wanted. Show him with an action. "I brought you on this picnic to spend time with you because you are the most special person on this planet."

I bought you this card because I can't imagine life without you. I called you at lunch time from work because I was thinking about you. I booked a weekend away for the two of us because I want to spend time with you. I arranged a babysitter so we could have dinner, just the two of us.

You look as wonderful as you did when I first met you. I remember how special you made me feel on our first date. Our daughter's eyes are almost as beautiful as yours. I am so lucky to have you.

Have you said these things recently? It's easy to forget, but love isn't about being, it's about doing. If you have said these things, then say something else! Do something else. See a movie, plant a tree, visit a museum, go for a drive. Spend time together. Find new ways to make them understand how they are special. Your partner matters enough to keep things fresh in any way you can. We all grow every day, so our relationship needs work to keep pace. And we all have the means to do it.

Learn more about this author, Eliza Sininen.
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