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"Suicidal"

When I look at myself in the mirror,
I want it to crack.
When I think of my friends,
I don't think of many.
When I remember the good times,
there are not many golden memories.

I know that no one is perfect,
but I don't even rank on the norm.

I don't want to go on living a life of nothing.
I want something special, but there is none for me.

I can only consider one way out.
One way that will lead me to victory - or possible loss.
This is the path that many have chosen to end their woes.
I only hope that it is faithful and just in its work for me.

I think that maybe I am not right in this escape.
I think that maybe I could make things better, but
NO, I have tried before and was not successful.
'If at first you don't succeed, then obviously don't attempt it again.'

I have handled my failures fairly well up until now.
I have had too much of a bad thing.
There is no happiness to my being.
The excitement of my life comes from watching the water dry on the bottom of my bath tub.

The end is only too close.
I can smell the success.
I only have one problem left to solve.
Where does my daddy hide his gun?

Learn more about this author, Kim Jackson.
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