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Ages 49-59: A Crisis for Women

By the time women are at this stage, they have developed a richness of friendships with other women which helps them to determine and understand their own individuality. They have reared their children through adolescence and into adulthood. Now it is time to reflect and accept their own lives. It may be seen as a time of freedom from childbearing responsibilities and for new opportunities to pursue interests in personal development or career. They are likely to seek fulfilment and significance outside the home, in either new training, employment or voluntary activities. If they are already in work, they will be moving up the ladder. But this is also another period of stress and uncertainty for women, due to the menopause, which may occur in the late forties or early fifties.

A woman may experience a hormone imbalance at about the same time her last child leaves home. She may find herself readjusting in her marriage, especially if her partner is at a different staging post and looking to a rival for affirmation and support. She is also likely to be an in-law and a grandparent at the same time her hormone imbalance is producing states of depression, loneliness and bewilderment. Not a pleasant time to be living with someone who is also introspective and unhappy. Neither is it the best time to feel undervalued and taken for granted.

At a time when everything seems to be happening, life can become another mid-life crisis because many women now fear the ageing process, especially if they start to feel unattractive. Many dread being 50 for all its perceived implications. A breakdown may occur in a mother's lifestyle and thinking patterns, particularly when the children depart and leave a huge emotional void. Depending on her self-evaluation and level of esteem, she may make some desperate changes in an attempt to escape the life she leads. This is often a time to start anew with a fresh approach or shiny new partner; a time when many people need understanding, encouragement and support to be able to value the remaining stages of their life and to make the most of their personal journey. Yet, though many couples draw closer together for support, for too many others it's a time when they are unlikely to get support and that results in many divorces. In the UK, 72% of divorces sought by people over 50, since 2000, have been initiated by women.

Looking Back to The Past
The young/old dilemma becomes very important here too because when a person

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