by Cyn Bagley

Created on: July 29, 2007   Last Updated: June 30, 2008

Debbie stood on the footbridge, contemplating the river below as it churned and dashed against the rocks. Light bubbles floated to the surface. Water sprayed her face. She closed her eyes and listened to the birds in the distance.

The trees surrounding the bridge gloomed. Although a dark forest green, they felt dark and ominous, pulling her most primitive fears. It was the land of Hansel and Gretel. But here, on the bridge, she felt safe.

Years before, a long time in the spring of her life, her parents had named her "Deborah." It was a good solid bible name. It was a name to be proud of .. her parents would say. They would look fondly at her, knowing she would "keep the faith."

Each year, following her birth, she tried her best to follow in her parents' footsteps. She would try her hardest to carry on her ancestors unique calling of taking the "truth" to the world. The world, she was taught, was a corrupt place and the earth groaned under its dark weight. Her role in this life was to lift this dark burden.

But, as she went into the world and testified, she found good people - people who loved their families and their communities. She had thought that these people were drunks and addicts. She found that it wasn't so. They were living happy lives. It was a punch to her beliefs. The world outside her home seemed was not so dark.

She wondered at her own life. Her parents were stern in their righteousness. Music that didn't conform was evil. Rock and roll was the devil's music. They were never proud of their own children. She remembered many times when she had felt her parent's wrath. She had been broken to their will and to the will of the gospel.

When she looked at the "Word," she found lessons in love. "Love thy neighbor." It didn't mean love thy neighbor if they are in the same religion. Or love thy neighbor if they were in your family. It was simple. So who lived in the dark? Who lived in the light?

Now, in her late summer years, she was disturbed by her earlier beliefs. She had testified, she had acknowledged, and she had followed. Was it wrong? Had she buried her soul under untruths? She had given so much for this calling. Had she given up her opportunities in vain?

She opened her eyes. The sun fell full on the forest, lighting up the dark shadows under tall fir trees. Soon the cold would come, the leaves would fall, and she would be gray and still.

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