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"Is there any biblical support for dating?"

In itself, this is a very awkward question. What qualifies something as "biblical support"? Obviously there are no explicit examples or teachings on dating in Scripture. Given the variety of models (speed dating, blind dates, double dates, etc), what is meant by "dating" in this question? I assume what the question is asking is this:

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"From an exploration of Scripture, is dating an acceptable practice?"

Even this question is difficult, as it seems to suggest (as does the first question) that the issue can be answered with a simple yes/no response. This over simplifies a far more complex issue. So where does this leave us?

The fact is that if the Bible is going to say anything about dating, it can only do so implicitly, which also means that it is far more likely to be circumstantial and contextual. It will be open to interpretation, differing in the culture and circumstance it is addressing and something we can establish absolute certainty about. Therefore, I will start by saying this: Neither side of this argument can be proved to be true or false, therefore while we may have convictions, we must hold them cautiously and with humility.

Most of the critique of dating that I see in Christian culture stems from legitimate concern for how casually some people enter into such relationships. Personally I do not believe that dating should be done as a social activity, as in one should not go out on dates as recreation just as one would read a book or go to a sports game.

That said, neither do I think one should only date if you are seriously consider the person for marriage. Certainly dating should be built in part on the assumption that this relationship might develop into something more, but dating can be a healthy way of exploring potential relationships.

We must also recognize the culture in which this question is being asked. As our own cultures here in North America become increasingly multi-cultural, we must recognize that our choices, especially where relationships are concerned, must be made with greater care. For some, dating would be very inappropriate given their culture. This does not make dating immoral as an absolute, but inappropriate for given individuals/cultures.

Dating is a cultural practice that is largely amoral. It is a freedom, and like any freedom, must be used responsibly. In our culture of individualism, entitlement and casual relationships, Christians must adhere to a higher standard- not the abandonment of dating altogether, but responsible example of how it might be done well. Like the question of Christians drinking alcohol (for which I have written another article here at Helium.com), we must not remove a freedom in our attempt to avoid its abuse.

Dating, therefore, should not be seen as something contrary to Christian belief or practice, but something that must be done with intentionality, accountability and caution.

Learn more about this author, Jamie Arpin-Ricci.
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