There are 5 key stages to any relationship between two people seeking love:
1. Selection
2. Besotment
3. Familiarisation
4. Alignment
5. Reinforcement

Relationships break up because people are unskilled in dealing with the different stages of getting to know one another and then bottle out when things get rough. The only guaranteed stage of fulfilment is the SELECTION stage. This is very exciting and it feels great when we believe we have selected the right person for us. If that is the case, the besotment with one another is likely to become more intense, occupying each other's time and thoughts.

Selection
The main thing to remember at this stage of selection is that all that glitters is NOT gold! Keep an open mind here, no matter how difficult it is to do so. Keep expectations to a minimum too. Don't burden this selection with your expectation of permanence because that person might just be there to boost your confidence and esteem for the next stage of your journey. Just be patient and allow the reason for the friendship to unfold. It could be magical as your anxieties are then reduced to a minimum. Rather than fretting about anything at all relating to your choice, whether it is the right choice, or how long you both might last, you will merely enjoy that person AS THEY ARE. You will enjoy each day without worrying about tomorrow or next year, and allow the both of you to get used to each other and gradually appreciate what you both desire. Instead of wondering where you are heading, GIVE THANKS for someone being in your life to love you, for no matter how long, and enjoy every single second. It's a desire to control things why we worry about the future when today could be all we have! That's also why you get hurt - unrealistic expectations or too much negativity.

Besotment
This is obviously the most fulfilling stage in a relationship with all the sexual and intimate activities which tend to dominate. DON'T try to control anything either by dictating the direction of the friendship or exactly when you should see each other. Let that evolve and unfold too, but with enough space between you to miss each other sometimes. Don't question your partner's movements when you are apart or try to dictate what should happen when you meet. Again, consensus is very important. Allowing new friendships to breathe through a lack of control will enable greater respect and commitment to develop. Sometimes we are so keen to move things along quickly, we kill

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