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Teaching children the value of respect begins in the home. The way we respect each other and our children effects how our children in turn will respect us, and others. Through our own actions much is learned.

Discipline can be one arena where the level of respect your child has for you can be seen most clearly. A child who has a great deal of respect for the parent will be able to recognize the parents discontent with their behavior. Because the child respects the parent, the behavior will be easily corrected. A child with no respect however will defy and even elevate the undesirable behavior until the situation grows out of hand.

The key of course is mutual respect. We too often see a child's needs and words as holding less weight than those of an adult. Whether Mr. Teddy comes along for the car ride or not IS a life and death matter to a toddler. Realize that to you, there may be little importance placed on such trivial things, however these are the foundations of a child's universe. Just as you expect certain things from life, like your morning coffee or the local sports section, children expect their favorite cereal and their bedtime story. What is important in the world of a child is something far off from what is actually important to most adults. We have to remember that we as parents need to show respect for these things. These are the elements of reality that are most important to your child. The foundation for future learning.

An infant can come to think that you have totally disappeared forever when they can not see you. Respect that and keep them close when they are in distress. They will learn that you care for their feelings.

A toddler can come to think that you do not love them when you are too busy to answer their constant questions. Provide an answer, they will know that you care about the things in their world, and will show interest in the things you care about.

A child will come to think you are mean, unfair and cruel when you deny them. Instead provide a choice, show the child that you want them to enjoy themselves but that the better choice is to finish diner first before playing, because then he'll have more energy and grow stronger. The child will see that you are looking out for his best interest and that you are not just keeping him at the table to be mean.

A pre teen will come to think you hate her when you won't allow her to stay at a friend's house. Explain why you don't feel comfortable with her staying there and work toward a solution, offer a sleep over in your own home.

A teenager will come to think you are trying to ruin his life when you won't let him hang out with a group of kids who you know to be delinquent troublemakers. Instead insist that you want him to have friends, offer to have his friends over so long as they can respect house rules, get to know them. Even offer outings and structured activities. Yes you can hang out with Josh, but not at the park downtown, why don't we go paint balling this weekend? He will appreciate the effort and see that you are not trying to take his friends away from him. Maybe all the other kids need is an adult to respect them too!

An adult will thank you, for providing answers, respect and love for them through their whole life. Will appreciate your guidance, and your respect for their needs.

Remember, even if you are thirty years old when you start your journey as a parent, your children will be adults, as you are now. Childhood is so short. Cherish it and teach mutual respect. It is the most rewarding feeling to have your child respect you in return.

Learn more about this author, Rycharde Angel.
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