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sexual encounters are usually fraught with danger. To begin with, most women view romance as the biggest turn-on to enjoying intercourse. As a prelude to any sex, a woman may fantasise about romantic settings in which she might be holding hands, talking, laughing, dancing, etc. Later on, the nice-looking, sweet-talking confident lover, with the great sense of humour (not the great penis!) admires her appeal and tells her about his feelings, his need for love, perhaps their future together, etc. She imagines being held tightly and kissed over and over, with perhaps some gentle caressing of various parts of her body. Eventually he undresses her and they have sex, but that isn't the end of her story. After love-making, she imagines being held, comforted and told that sex has brought them even closer. She expects reassurance that she was an exciting sex partner and that he will now want to do many other routine things with her, not just desire her body!

The man in the same situation is likely to perceive it most differently, especially if he just wants to have 'fun' and fancies a 'quick shag'. The fewer preliminaries, the better. Wining, dining and dancing are often regarded as necessary preludes that the man wants to conclude, sooner rather than later, in order to cut to the chase and get on with the action. Sex for women might be an integral part of an emotional connection, and take a long time to master, but many men do not necessarily need to put the two elements together for their satisfaction!

Learn more about this author, Elaine Sihera.
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